I don’t get how some people can practically roll in poison ivy and never get a spot while others can simply be downwind of it and get an outbreak that resembles textbook leprosy. I just happen to be in the category of “breaks out as the word is spoken.” So, you would think I would know what the vile shit looks like so I could stay as far away from it as possible, right? Oh hell no! Sure I’ve heard the phrase “leaves of three let it be” but there are a lot of plants that have three leaves that aren’t poisonous so I never really worried about it.
That is, until now.
After having family members inspect my yard and researching images of the beast online I am obsessed thinking about it because my yard is absolutely infested! There are hairy looking vines all over my fence that are a half inch in diameter and clearly have been there for many years. It’s growing up one of my trees, around my air conditioner, and hither-thither throughout the planting beds. If only I had done some investigating prior to last weekend when I took it upon myself to pull a bunch of those vines and plucked what I thought were random oak sprouts from the ground. Now I’m using Calamine like its body lotion, trying not to scratch my skin off, and shopping for a level B Hazmat suit.
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