Things you might have overheard this past weekend.

• Your language is offensive!
• That's what "she" said.
• Why is my name different? --- It's because you forgot your card dumbass!
• Help! I'm in hell. I'm in Buffalo's watching the KSU game surrounded by purple AND I'm out of water!
• If some creep starts bothering us tonight I'm gonna go, "HAAA HAAA HAA HAAA!" That will scare him away!

• Oh my gosh... she's rolling that big ol' cooler into McDonalds!
• Most people just say "hello" when they meet someone.
• What is that smell?!
• I got a text 19 times that says 'monkey balls!'
• If she face plants I'm laughing. Just sayin'.
• My legs hurt. -- That's because you ate at IHOP.
• Do we need to send you a text occasionally to remind you to open your mail?
• Oh my gosh.. that dude looks like Aggieville Bill in 10 years!
• Quick! Put your arm around me. NOW!
• Dude.. do you eat garbage?
• It's right there! You are f@#$in' dumb.
• I'm not making a payment this month cause my On-Star sucks!
• Okay.. you are gonna have to trust me. 
• The salt from those french fries burned my nose!
• And so it begins...one of us falls. Well, she is the weakest link. 
• Do you believe in signs? That one says "bitch." You did say you wanted to move here to be closer to your people.
• Are you girls here with girls or are you girls with guys.. or both?