I remember in kindergarten this short, stocky little boy use to terrify me by chasing me around the playground trying to kiss me on the cheek. I HATED recess for that very reason and I was so relieved when another girl caught his attention so I could slip back into the background.

I've enjoyed blending in my whole life. I don't say that as a 'poor pitiful me' thing, I'm sincere. I don't like attention, never have and unless I have some sort of traumatic brain injury, that's not ever going to change. Let me be clear on one thing however; being forgotten is not the same as not wanting to draw attention. It always sucks to know someone you care about doesn't think of you any longer but I digress.

Meeting Daniel was purely by chance. I was shocked at how easily I gravitated to him and vice versa. For a change I had to figure out how to get this guy's attention, something I am not good at doing and talk about an awkward process. I knew if I really wanted to meet him I couldn't let myself just fade into the crowd.  I had to get out of my comfort zone and take a chance. It was well worth the risk.

It's awkward to profess your admiration for someone especially when you don't know them very well. In a million years I would never have expected to have a 'secret admirer.' In my head that is freaking hilarious! I have never easily accepted compliments. A part of me doesn't feel worthy of the words so I tend to treat certain people cooly. Often times I feel like I want to show emotion, but it simply doesn't happen so I do nothing. I wonder if this is a trait we acquire as we get older or perhaps it is from years of getting our feelings trampled.

This week I was the one doing the trampling. It was not intentional but there was nothing I could say so I pulled the usual and said nothing. I'm very content and happy with where I am and I have fought hard to get here. I did not solicit this person's attention and this little incident will quickly pass I'm sure.